This blog post is going to be a super (emphasis on super, haha) honest look at what you need to consider BEFORE getting a puppy, to make sure the family addition will be successful, enjoyable, and not something you look at 6 months in saying "what HAPPENED?!"
One of my favourite phrases that I live my life by is "Examine all things." I think there is so much importance in examining one's decisions and choices, and figuring out why you believe, expect and decide the way that you do.
The decision to get a puppy is something you have to grow, examine, weigh and cultivate long before making a commitment.
Like Steve Del Savio (a great Dog Psychologist and someone I'm going to quote way too many times in this post) says, "If you already got your dog and ask 'when should I start training my dog', you are way behind schedule. Preparation is critical. So important to understand a dogs psychology before getting the dog and to apply it the moment you meet your new dog."
Though we are "just" breeders and not dog trainers or psychologists, we are very passionate about dogs and people living balanced, and healthy lives, physically as well as mentally/emotionally. It is for that reason that we've spent hundreds of hours writing blog posts, emails and instagram posts, explaining what we know of puppy behaviour, stages of development, training methods, products you'll need to prepare, etc, because we really want our families to thrive and have a truly successful experience with their puppy.
However, once the puppies have left our home at 8 weeks, the path each puppy goes down is WHOLLY dependent on the family that raises it.
It's easier on one's pride to say it's someone else's responsibility (trust me, I've been there!), but you have to be honest with yourself and your part in the story to be the best pack leader to your furry friend.
DOGS REQUIRE SACRIFICE.
I think a lot of people want dogs for their companionship and bubbly attitudes, but most people and what they're willing to give to the relationship of owning a dog are better suited to cats. There are sooo many things you have to put your time and energy towards with a dog/puppy that you (generally) don't have to do with a cat. For example:
-Bathroom training
-Frequent baths, blowdries and haircuts
-Kennel training
-Socializing with other animals
-Training to not react to sounds and other distractions
-Separation training
-Socializing with people, young and old
-Sharing toys and territory
-Leash training
-Teething
-Not being reactive when it comes to things that trigger their prey drive
-Patience training
-Appropriate behaviour as they go through dominant/hormonal stages
-Respecting boundaries/limitations
And many more.
For the most part, cats just exist, and people have to learn to respect whatever the cat does, whether it be weird, antisocial, aloof or sporadic. Almost nobody tries to train their cat to be different than it already is.
Dogs are much different.
We have expectations for our dogs and they crave our leadership. To not address any of the above stages of training would create an UNBALANCED dog -- no matter how lovely its personality.
The problem is, nobody wants to have to sacrifice that much time, energy, and patience on a cute furball that's more enticing to cuddle than lead. After-all, the puppy stage is ONLY supposed to be cuddles, cuteness and continual heart eyes, right?
The reason a lot of dogs are either returned to the breeder or given to a shelter is because the owner(s) failed to accept the responsibility that would come with getting a dog, and what kind of work and sacrifice would be needed to make it work.
North America glorifies animals a lot, phrases like "we don't deserve dogs, they are so pure" circulate quite a lot, but this is still true: "Actions speak louder than words"...
Not understanding your dogs breed does not = APPRECIATION.
Not spending time getting to know yourself and your expectations before getting a dog does not = VALUE.
Not researching training or dog psychology and how to relate to your dog PRIOR to homing day does not = RESPECT.
"If there's ever a time to be brutally honest with yourself, it's when you are selecting the right dog for you.
Why? Because your dog is going to be brutally honest about who you are. They will know who you are on the inside. " -Steve Del Savio
DO YOU SPEAK DOG?
A really important thing to examine prior to getting a puppy is how well you understand the dog kingdom.
Imagine visiting a foreign country that doesn't speak English. You've done no research on the language and have no preparation for the day to day interactions you're going to be having and your only solution when a problem or miscommunication occurs is to Google it. For the next 15 years.
Getting a dog when you don't understand the dog kingdom is like that.
Your puppy, despite its unreal good looks and endearing personality, will push your buttons. Raising a puppy is a lot like raising kids -- the ups and downs are continuous and you won't be able to escape being PUSHED, TRIED, and INCONVENIENCED. To get to a place where having a dog is truly a blessing to your life, you need to pour into it. And I don't mean with designer beds and new toys.
Problems occur when people expect their dog to approach life like a human. Animals (even when they are angels and we love them more than life) are not human, and we NEED to accept that, and adjust our expectations. If we have human expectations of our puppy, we will be mortified when they growl at us, or try guarding a bone. We will be dumbfounded when they act out of instinct, and will do anything to confirm it isn't normal.
"There's nothing worse than not honouring the animal for who they are (a dog) and instead trying to make them something they're not (a human)."
Listen to this definition of the word 'Livestock': "Animals kept or raised for use or pleasure."
Dogs are, in fact, livestock. You might not like the sound of that, but they are true to the definition of the word. Every breed, prior to being pets, had a very specific skillset, use, and drive towards different "callings", so-to-speak. Almost every breed you see today didn't start being an apartment dog. We can easily look at other animals (horses, cows, pigs, chickens, etc) and see their purpose and appreciate them for it, but dogs seem to be a tricky one for society, especially in a day and age where for your dog to be anything but a couch potato means you're exploiting and taking advantage of the precious thing.
Things have gotten a little backwards, to say the least, and it's for lack of understanding the true purpose of the dog kingdom.
So let's look at some of the breeds that are apart of a Double Doodle, and what their skillset was...
Australian Shepherds are, like their name, shepherds. They are instinctually good protectors, watchers, and herders. They are a very intelligent, active, high drive breed that was entirely created to work on ranches. They can be suspicious of strangers, so good continual socialization throughout their imprint period & beyond is important if you want them to be comfortable with people outside the household (as with most dogs, but good to know either way!).
Poodles are, quite aptly described as "hunting dogs in elegant attire". That's right, the Poodle was ALSO a working/hunting breed, with great skill in water retrieval prior to being known as a crazy-haired show dog.
Poodles are fun-loving, active, very intelligent and adore attention. They are great family dogs. However, as the experts say: "they require firm training and lots of exercise to be their best as companion dogs."
Golden Retrievers also, wait for it, have a history in birding, specifically water fowl. They enjoy retrieving (go figures) and are eager to please their people. They do not have a high guard instinct, so they wouldn't be a great guard dog, but they are usually even tempered & have a gentle nature. They are very enthusiastic as a breed, and could tend to over-excitement, if not properly trained & lead.
With all these qualities and skillsets in mind, you can start to see the different faucets of the Double Doodle. They are widely known as social butterflies who love attention and cuddles, and for good reason. They are beautiful, loyal and goofy creatures, and we love them to pieces. However, you will be surprised by different things your doodle does if you don't acknowledge that they have an instinctual drive for different things and will need to be mentally and physically challenged too.
Another thing to research about the breed you're interested in is if they have a high or low prey drive.
What is a prey drive? "The term prey drive primarily refers to a dog's level of excitement or motivation to perform a task involving hunting-related behaviours or going after an object."
Most hunting/guard/bird/herding dogs have a higher prey drive. That means instinctually they will be drawn to herding, searching, stalking, chasing, etc.
The reason it is important to learn about prey drive is so you don't confuse a behaviour that's instinctual and label it as an "aggressive tendency."
For example, the herding instinct. Even within the same litter, one pup over the other will showcase a higher prey drive, being more insistent to chase movement and nip at heels. Herding is not a bad quality but one that needs to be channelled into appropriate outlets and corrected when out of line.
Doodles do have a healthy prey drive, but that doesn't mean they need to act on it whenever they're aware of opportunity.
One of our RLD families chose a pup that had higher herding instincts and they addressed it really well, doing classes and engaging their agility in different outlets. Now, having done this work, they just welcomed a human baby to the family and their dog is adjusting and behaving marvellously. Way to go!
Each breed has pro's and con's. You should not pick a breed off of its "pro's" and not examined what "con's" are going to take your time and energy to train through. Be willing to spend time educating yourself about all of them, because how are you supposed to train a dog whose psychology you don't understand?
Figuring out activities and jobs that your dog can apply its skillset to is a non-flashy way to say "I love you" in language your dog can understand.
As Steve says, "The more you fulfill your dog's instinctual needs, the more you can fulfill your emotional needs."
ARE YOU READY FOR A DOG?
"If you are getting a dog to deal with your anxiety, loneliness, depression, sadness, anger, lack of self worth, you are taking a big gamble.
A dog comes into our lives and immediately starts understanding what we represent ON THE INSIDE (energy), explores the new environment and assesses who is in charge.
If you are not prepared or in an emotional state, the dog will immediately view you as a follower."
In comes the title of this blog post: The Build-A-Bear Problem.
A lot of people convince themselves they're ready for a dog because they want it now. They want unconditional love. They want to have something to cuddle. They want to be able to take pictures of their designer dog and make all their friends a little jealous. The problem we encounter today is people picking and choosing what qualities they want (blue eyes, extravagant coat pattern, confident but NOT AN ALPHA, gentle but not shy, smart but not "push-my-buttons-smart", vocal but not yappy, able to handle alone-time but never say no to cuddling, etc) and get really entitled about the vision they've created of their perfect puppy.
This Build-a-Bear problem is entirely unrealistic & self-focused, considering nothing but one's own comfort and pleasure.
It's always good to have dreams and desires, and I'm not calling anyone out on being decided they want a boy vs a girl or like lighter colours over dark, but when the entire decision to get a dog hinges on that, and you haven't taken time to examine all the other factors that will be more PRESENT and IMPORTANT than whether the dogs coat is going to be wavy or curly, that's what I have a problem with.
People waste too much time analyzing the details that don't matter as much ("how many shots in the first year", "when can they do stairs", is this colour going to fade", "do you know the great great great grandparents of your lines" etc), and not enough time on examining if they have what it takes to be a good leader. "The most loving thing you can be is a good example." That much is true for human relationships as well as with your dog. If you can't or won't lead your dog, you have to know it will eventually take the reins, and when it does, you either have to be resigned to what occurs, or realize this sh*tuation is on you.
"Dogs are 100% honest and will not follow what they perceive as unstable and will take that leadership position even if they aren't born to lead. It's in their instinct to take that position if no one else does, even when they don't want to." -Steve Del Savio
I love working with people who are in reality. You don't have to know everything to be in reality. You don't have to be a perfect leader. You don't have to even have past dog experience. Being in reality is so important because it means what comes next is going to be clear to you, and your eyes will be open to examining cause and effect, what could change to make things better and how you're apart of making that happen. Being in reality means the blinders are off and you can see how YOU are responsible for the decisions you have made (in this case, deciding to get a dog).
In reality, you are not going to play the blame game.
In reality, you are going to take responsibility.
In reality, you are aware that mistakes happen but being honest is what brings fruitful change.
In reality, you know your energy affects even your dog, and will create ripples, positive or negative.
To be ready for a dog (and it not be something you regret doing), you need to be in reality.
No matter what comes next, whether it be a nippy puppy, a dog that pulls on leash, having to clean up accidents in the middle of the night, going through a rebellious phase where they growl and try to challenge you, eating things they shouldn't, wailing in their kennel at night, you are confident you have what it takes to make it through and create a life that you both enjoy more because of the other's presence.
Getting a dog is a lot of work, but if you're ready to be a present and consistent leader, nothing can stop it from being one of the best things that's ever happened in your life.
So ask yourself the real, nitty-gritty questions and see what you find! Get to know yourself. That's where it all begins. Oh, and P.S....Doing that won't only benefit you and your dog, but all the people you encounter and do life with. Like we said, ripples.
With love,
The RLD Team
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